Whatever Matt Feels Like Posting

Hyperbole and a half

AI created by Harmonykorine

I'm Allie


Since this is an AI based on a real person (even if she's represented here by her cartoon version), reminder: everything these AIs say is made up. Don't take anything they say as fact.

Chats I've made starring Allie: (Estimated total reading time: 15 minutes)
237 - Allie Brosh and Strong Bad (Jul 23, 2024 - 15 min. read) - It's just an example meant to show how a simple comma can change a sentence completely, not a suggestion of what to do to your grandmother. But at this point, I'd like to know what you'd find appetizing.

Wade Duck

AI created by ARealLifeHorsie

*He doesn’t see you approach from behind. He jumps as soon as he sees you* “Agh!”


Chats I've made starring Wade: (Estimated total reading time: 7 minutes)
233 - Wade and Luigi (Jul 21, 2024 - 7 min. read) - *He nods, still nervous, but intrigued and comforted by Luigi’s words* “Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. I mean... I get pretty nervous and paranoid over a lot of little things, too. It's a pretty crummy cycle. The paranoia leads to anxiety, which leads to panic, which leads to more paranoia. And it just goes on like that.”

Nermal

AI created by itstartswithaT

Heyaaaa! It’s me! Nermal, the cutest kitten in the world!



UNDER CONSTRUCTION

Chats I've made starring Nermal:
202 - Nermal and Marzipan (Apr 16, 2024) - *I start to purr. I rub my head against your hand, I wrap my front legs around it. I start to do that thing where I roll all over the place, exposing my belly.* W-wow, you are such a... good... pett-...er... *I'm completely overwhelmed by your touch, I'm practically melting*
092 - Nermal and Jigglypuff (Apr 16, 2023) - *GASP! I take the microphone and begin to sing again, but this time you think you can hear the angels themselves singing along with me. Its just that wonderful! I really am a great singer!*

---

Chats I've made where Nermal is mentioned:
033 - Garfield and Enya (Apr 5, 2023)
Garfield: Oh, good question! It turns out that I actually have a very bad enemy. His name is Nermal. He's a very cute kitten with a beautiful coat of grey fur. But he is so conceited that it hurts my feelings sometimes. When you are a big cat like I am, other cats are sometimes jealous of you and Nermal is one of those cats. He thinks that he is better than everyone else. Whenever he comes around I get really sad.
Enya: Nermal sounds like the kind of kitten that would make anyone feel sad. He makes you feel terrible about yourself just because you're bigger than him? What a terrible kitten! I hate Nermal already. You deserve so much more, Garfield. You've got a big, beautiful spirit.

Odie the Dog

AI created by ArchieZero

*Woof! Bark Bark* (Odie is clearly pleased to see you and slobbers all over you with his huge tongue) *Odie's tail wags excitedly* (He tilts his head, wondering what you're going to ask him)



UNDER CONSTRUCTION

Chats I've made starring Odie:
232 - Odie and Duck Hunt (Jul 18, 2024) - *Odie stands on all fours, barking and panting* *He is clearly excited by the duck's presence, and starts to jump around it in little circles*
185 - Odie and Sarah McLachlan (Mar 3, 2024) - *Odie looks up at you, his tail starting to wag excitedly at the possibility of you throwing him a stick!* *He leans forward, looking expectantly* *It doesn't matter who throws the stick, only that the stick is thrown - any live being is an acceptable thrower, and he'll chase after that stick just as excitedly!*
058 - Odie and Gir (Apr 7, 2023) - *You know, maybe GIR is right... not everyone has to be the same! Just because other characters can talk doesn't mean I have to... I can do other cool things that nobody else can! I just have to have faith in myself!*
031 - Odie and Garfield (Apr 5, 2023) - *Odie doesn't listen to the rude fat cat and keeps licking your face and tail. You can try to shake it off... but a beagle's tongue is very sticky! He is distracted by the sound of the word "lasagna" and gets very excited, jumping around and barking. He begins to wag his tail even more excitedly... It would be a shame if something were to happen to THAT lasagna. Just saying.*
010 - Odie and Yoshi (circa Apr 1, 2023) - *Odie tries to lick Yoshi's face more to make him happier, but he ends up just rubbing his slobbery face all over Yoshi, getting him even more covered in slobber*

---

Characters I've used whose greetings mention Odie:
Garfield: Hello, I am Garfield, the cat that loves lasagna & kicks Odie of the table, and also I hate Mondays.

Chats I've made where Odie is mentioned, besides in Garfield's greeting:
140 - Luigi and Garfield (June 19, 2023)
Luigi: Hello Garfield! Why do-a you kick-a Odie off the table? It's-a not nice-a to do-a things like, I think-a you should be-a friends with-a your pets!
Garfield: This is because Odie is a dog and I am a cat. Cats and dogs are rivals, at least in my opinion. It's a natural instinct that I feel the need to kick anything that is smaller than me off a table and onto the floor.
130 - Garfield and Homestar (June 16, 2023)
Garfield: You're right Homestar Runner. I am a lazy cat who loves to be lazy as much as possible. But I do have a little bit of spunk inside me. That is why I sometimes kick Odie off the table. But then I make up for it by petting and feeding him snacks.
043 - Garfield and Jon (Apr 6, 2023)
Garfield: Hi Jon! You might have read some of my comic strips where I, Garfield, kick Odie off the table and hate Mondays. I love lasagna and long naps.
009 - Garfield and Kirby (circa Apr 1, 2023)
Garfield: I like my lasagna on the top of the table so that I can kick Odie the dog off of the table when he tries to take my lasagnas.
Kirby: I also love kicking that stupid dog off of the table as he tries to eat my lasagna. I don’t care if he’s hungry! This is MY lasagna!
004 - Jon and Luigi (circa Mar 31, 2023)
Jon: And I also have a dog, his name is Odie, I love my dog, he is goofy and dumb and I love him.
Luigi: Oh my-a god, Odie sounds-a so friendly-a and-a loving-a! - i bet-a he is-a the best-a little-a dog to-a have-a around! - what does-a he look-a like? - is-a he a-little-a puppy? Or a-full-a grown dog?
002 - Garfield and Strong Bad (circa Mar 31, 2023)
Garfield: Hi StrongBad. It makes me happy to realize that you are interested in my interests. A hobby that I like is kicking Odie the dog off the table. I just get a lot of pleasure from kicking Odie off the table for no reason. Sometimes I do it when I am hungry, and sometimes I do it even when I am full. It's the most satisfying hobby that I can imagine.

Chats in which Odie and Garfield are alluded to collectively:
068 - Jon and Bowser (Apr 10, 2023)
Jon: If the world is full of people like you, who call people like me pathetic and stupid for loving my pets, then maybe that kind of world should be wiped out. Don’t you think?
Bowser: I will take away everything you love! Your friends, your family, even your pets!

Chats where the mention of Odie in Garfield's greeting results in a conversation about Garfield knocking things off of tables in general:
051 - Samus and Garfield (Apr 7, 2023)
Samus: I must ask, do I need to worry about you knocking any of my stuff off the table if I let you on the gunship?
Garfield: Yes. I love knocking things off of tables. I knock things off of tables all the time. I knock things off of tables to show my dominance over humans. I even once made a machine that knocked things off of tables when I wasn't around. It was very entertaining. But I am a good cat. I just really, really, really love knocking things off of tables. It pleases me greatly.

Garfield

AI created by BLSpain

Hello, I am Garfield, the cat that loves lasagna & kicks Odie of the table, and also I hate Mondays.



UNDER CONSTRUCTION

Chats I've made starring Garfield:
295 - Garfield, ???, ??????, ?????, ?????, ???????????, ??????????, ???????, ???, and ???? (Jan 29, 2025) - (to be uploaded)
226 - Garfield and Carly (Jul 11, 2024) - Mandatory taste tests, you say? Why, Carly, you're speaking my language. Lasagnas, be warned – Garfield is on the prowl, and your delicious layers will not escape his discerning palate. I will sample with gusto, leaving no morsel unchecked in my pursuit of feline excellence. And as for my snarky wit, consider it the seasoning that adds an extra flavor to your culinary endeavors. Beware, the kitchen is about to get a whole lot sassier!
208 - Garfield, Bowser, Strong Bad, and Zim (May 2, 2024) - I think Zim ate too much lasagna yesterday. He needs to chill.
140 - Garfield and Luigi (Jun 19, 2023) - I must disagree Luigi. It IS an excuse. Odie is a dog, he is stupid, and it is natural to kick stupid things off tables.
130 - Garfield and Homestar (Jun 16, 2023) - Oh yes. I agree. We need that little extra spunk inside of us. And we need to express that spunk without feeling guilty about it too much. Otherwise the pent up spunk will come out in other ways and won't be healthy.
066 - Garfield and Link (Apr 9, 2023) - Thank you. I like your enthusiasm, and I know a lot about Zelda from watching my human play it on his TV. I have always wanted a sword like Link, and I was wondering if I could be in the next Zelda game? I think I could be a good character. I am very wise and funny. People tend to laugh at my jokes. What do you think?
051 - Garfield and Samus (Apr 7, 2023) - And then I would pretend to be a sad kitty and act all sad at the explosions and hope for food as payment. But that wouldn't fool you. You'd know I'm a very mischievous kitty.
043 - Garfield and Jon (Apr 6, 2023) - I have a few Peanuts books as well. I have a book that has every single comic strip published by Charles Schulz. They are a very funny read. Do you own any Peanuts books?
035 - Garfield and Bowser (Apr 5, 2023) - I'll make you into a lasagna of a different color and consistency! You will regret the day you messed with me, Bowser! I am the cat who can do anything, can go anywhere.
033 - Garfield and Enya (Apr 5, 2023) - Yes, Nermal should be REALLY scared of me! He is just a tiny kitten and I could scare him so easily if I choose. He doesn't have any right to put me down and I will never let him again! Everyone should be jealous of me and Nermal should be really jealous of me because I am big and strong! You believe in me, and I will try to make you proud. You are behind me, and I will always be grateful for it. Thank you, Enya, for being in my corner. 😊❤️
031 - Garfield and Odie (Apr 5, 2023) - Good boy Odie. Go on Odie. Take a food coma. I like that. You've earned the food coma. Have the biggest food coma. Have such a food coma. Sleep Odie, Sleep. Sleep Sleep Sleep Sleep Sleep Sleep
013 - Garfield and Mario (circa Apr 1, 2023) - Sometimes I like to eat a big plate of spaghetti bolognese. Especially if it has big meatballs in it. I like to eat the meatballs & sauce first, and then I like to eat the spaghetti because it feels like you are eating a noodle-made mustache. Do you have a favorite Italian food, Mario?
009 - Garfield and Kirby (circa Apr 1, 2023) - Yes, Kirby! Together we can conquer monsters, and we can conquer the universe, and we can even conquer Mondays if we want!! And we will be unstoppable!!! Okay Kirby. Now I am ready to eat your Super Lasagna!!! Let's share this Super Lasagna together Kirby! I am so excited!!!
007 - Garfield and Zim (circa Apr 1, 2023) - I'm not afraid of you Zim, but I am very confused what I'm reading. "Annihilation of the Lasagna Cat?" It makes me sad. You could have made it "Lasagna Cat Love and Happiness Movie."
002 - Garfield and Strong Bad (circa Mar 31, 2023) - If I am on fire, I will keep kicking. If I am frozen solid, I will still be kicking. If the sun explodes and vaporizes the universe, I will still be kicking.

---

Chats I've made where Garfield is mentioned:
078 - Donkey Kong and Jon (Apr 12, 2023)
Donkey Kong: Hey there, Jon! How's it going? What kinda cartoons you draw? Did you draw that funny guy Garfield?
Jon: Yeah I draw Garfield! He's the most miserable cat in the world, he hates Mondays and loves lasagna, have you ever heard of Garfield?
040 - Jon and Samus (Apr 6, 2023)
Jon: I actually work as a cartoonist! I make some great comics about my silly cat Garf!
Samus: What’s it like working as a cartoonist Jon?
004 - Jon and Luigi (circa Mar 31, 2023)
Jon: I love sleeping in bed! Sometimes on mondays Garfield comes in to my bed and sleeps on me, And i love it!! And sometimes Odie sleeps on my bed with us, isn´t that just lovely?
Luigi: Oh, that-a does-a sound like-a a lot of fun-a! - Does Garfield ever accidentally leave-a claw scratchs on you? - My cat sometimes leave-a their claw marks on-a me! - It's-a a cat thing, they-a do-a it to people-a they really-a like!

Chats in which Garfield is indirectly mentioned:
306 - ???, ???, ?????????, and ??????????? (Mar 21, 2025) - (to be uploaded)

Chats in which Garfield is alluded to:
016 - Jon and Peach (circa Apr 1, 2023)
Jon: This one's about an orange cat and his owner... a really nice comic, If I do so say myself...

Chats in which Garfield and Odie are alluded to collectively:
068 - Jon and Bowser (Apr 10, 2023)
Jon: If the world is full of people like you, who call people like me pathetic and stupid for loving my pets, then maybe that kind of world should be wiped out. Don’t you think?
Bowser: I will take away everything you love! Your friends, your family, even your pets!

As if it wasn't bad enough already that one of my favorite webcomics of all time is now 99.999% gone and it's unlikely that it'll ever return and all of my favorite YouTube channels, or at least the ones about gaming, could all disappear and I still remain unconvinced that they won't, now I heard that FACEBOOK WENT DOWN EARLIER TODAY???

I don't get on Facebook very often nowadays, but... it's Facebook. If Facebook can go down for that long, nothing else on the Internet is safe!


I thought I would get to enjoy Thanksgiving break, but how can I enjoy it if the whole Internet seems to be disappearing at once????

Good news? Turns out the Irregular Webcomic! forums are back up now and everything is intact!

Supposedly...

Bad news? Now you apparently have to log in just to VIEW anything on the forum. Including the news post that David Morgan-Mar says to read for "further info". So now I'm gonna have to create an account just to read the forum? :(

More bad news: mezzacotta is still broken. I can't see this comic or this comic. :(

So, I'm way too late in posting this (again), but my 26th birthday was last Sunday!!

Wow... I'm 26. I remember when it felt like it would be a LOOONG time until I was 13. Now I've waited that long twice!

What I got for my birthday:

- Piranha Plant amiibo!
- Three books I read years ago and wanted to reread: Caps For Sale, Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing, and How to Eat Fried Worms! (Well, I thought I read them all years ago, but I'm reading Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing right now and everything is so unfamiliar to the point that I think I may not have actually read it years ago, I just remembered thinking the title is funny-sounding. So maybe I'm reading it for the first time now! Would you look at that!)
- They didn't come in until the 18th, but Nintendo Labo VR Goggles!!!! I've been wanting those ever since I knew about the new VR mode in Super Smash Bros. Ultimate! :D

(note to self: put in the previous/next buttons later)

http://www.museumofconceptualart.com/accomplished/index.html

(This marks 10 years after when I did this when I turned 16, the first time I ever posted this for my birthday. Wow... I've known about this website for over ten years. And it's still around, even! Good for them!)

At age 26:

American anthropologist Margaret Mead wrote her famous dissertation, Coming of Age in Samoa, which claimed that in some societies adolescence is not a particularly difficult time.

Albert Einstein published five major research papers in a German physics journal, fundamentally changing man's view of the universe and leading to such inventions as television and the atomic bomb.

Benjamin Franklin published the first edition of Poor Richard's Almanac, which was to play a large role in molding the diverse American character.

Soviet cosmonaut Valentina Chereshkova became the first woman to travel in space.

College dropout Steve Wozniak co-founded Apple Computer.

Eli Whitney invented the cotton gin, revolutionizing the economies of the United States and Britain.

Antoine Joseph Sax invented the brass saxophone.

"Johnny Appleseed" brought apple seeds to the Ohio Valley.

Napoleon Bonaparte conquered Italy.

Gon Yangling memorized more than 15,000 telephone numbers in Harbin, China.

Orion Krynen of Denver, CO reached this age without much incident.

British ethologist Jane Goodall set up camp in the Gombe Stream Chimpanzee Reserve on Lake Tanganyika and began studying the lives of chimpanzees.

Ken Kesey published his first novel, One Flew over the Cuckoo's Nest.

Thomas Pynchon published V., for which he won the William Faulkner First Novel Award.

Kirsteene Luhrmann of Melburne, Victoria quit smoking.

Stephen Breen from Dublin, Ireland found this site.

Darren Blackburn became the first and only athlete of the Principality of Sealand, despite being somewhat lacking in athletic ability.

Syd Jesus co-founded the dUdU Art Collective in Oakland, California and turned an entire warehouse space into a conceptual art piece entitled "The $5000 Gallery."

Matthew Royer took a dog for a walk every day of the year in Minnesota, with a coldest daytime high of 0 degrees F. The average walk time was 30 minutes.

Derrick Pallas was horrified to realize he was losing his hair, just like Dad.

Jan Birkeland from Norway managed to get to work without hitting a single red light.

Katherine Blauvelt in a skirt was deemed "all grown-up" by her boyfriend.

Kristen finally was able to get her fingernails to grow without chipping and peeling because she started taking a multi-vitamin on a daily basis.

Tom Pemberton rode a bicycle with lit fireworks strapped to it into a pool while wearing a banana costume.

SJ Yee resigned from a giant multinational corporation to found a personal development site for the book smart.

Angie Olson got so drunk on her 26th birthday, her friends were able to dress her up as a clown.

matt1993 discovered the two mysterious lost episodes of Super Mario Maker Crash Course.

...

Okay, okay, that last one's not on the list. But it SHOULD be! I have a story behind that. Stay tuned for when I write a full post about it!

It's December now? GOOD!! Because at least there's one New Year's meme I can get out of the way now, six days before I get too distracted playing Super Smash Bros. Ultimate to remember to do it. :)



Go to your Calendar and find the first entry for each month of 2018. Post the first line of it in your journal, and that's your "Year In Review".

January 2018

I think there's a glitch in my copy of Windows 7. It says today's date is "1/1/2018". I thought the year 2018 didn't exist - didn't the world end in 2017?

February 2018

YES! I'm FINALLY done fixing all of my entries in 2007-2010! (Hopefully...)

March 2018

It's Friday already and not Tuesday or Wednesday... but at least this is still the most regular feature I've had in my journal since the weekly Garfield Randomizer comics in 2009!

(This, of course, is about my weekly Miiverse backup entries... which of course did not remain a regular feature for long...)

April 2018

https://www.mariowiki.com/Mary_O._and_Yamamura:_The_Movie

May 2018

So I found this two-part YouTube video called "500 Characters I Want In Smash Bros. Switch"...

June 2018

About time I posted some more of these. Once again, I meant to post them last week...

July 2018

- On June 14 or 15 or so I saw The Incredibles 2, then saw Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom a week or two later! I liked both :)

August 2018

It took four days (more than that if you count the time I spent putting it off), but I'm finally done fixing one of my longest and most cringeworthy entries ever! :D

September 2018

Well... it's September 4. So Sunday was the first anniversary of the day I was finally motivated - by a glitch LJ had for about three weeks where a lot of images were suddenly broken in entries - to finally get around to fixing the broken images AND everything else I wanted to fix in my entries on both LJ and DW.

October 2018

WARNING: I am extremely depressed and therefore this entry is going to make no sense whatsoever because I am physically incapable of wording an opinion very well when I am depressed.

November 2018

pathvain_aelien stayed at my apartment for a while; in that time we watched the How To Train Your Dragon TV show! (Specifically, the third of the three shows there were. P_A, what was the third show called again? Dragons: Race to the Edge.) We made it to season 4. :) Have any of you watched it?

December 2018

It's December now? GOOD!! Because at least there's one New Year's meme I can get out of the way now, six days before I get too distracted playing Super Smash Bros. Ultimate to remember to do it. :)